It’s been almost 20 years since I began walking my own spiritual path. After 30 years rejecting on anything religious, I discovered I lacked something to hold onto when my life was shattered by self-induced trauma-drama.
Some very good men at the Mankind Project opened my eyes and heart to the power of rituals to awaken my consciousness to a higher power. This led to years of intensive spiritual study and practice and ultimately to Cathy and Clarity®.
And yet, I find myself, especially in the past few weeks, more fearful than I prefer. Sometimes I begin to wonder if this stuff works, if after 20 years of spiritual study I still find myself floundering in fear and anxiety?
One of my favorite authors often writes about walking the line between fear and faith. “I have a lot of faith and a lot of fear a lot of the time,” writes Anne LaMont in Small Victories, (New York, Riverhead Books, 2014, p 6). This reminds me that having faith does not eliminate the reality that fearful things happen.
There are many things I cannot control and one primary thing over which I have total control—what I think. When distant politics conjure a fear of a dystopian future, the truth is, the fear resides completely in my own thoughts (whether or not those fears are “real”). I have control over what thoughts I linger upon, and how I can change my fearful thoughts to faithful ones.
It’s most important for me to remember: I ALSO HAVE A LOT OF FAITH A LOT OF THE TIME. My primary job in this lifetime is to live my own life fully by focusing my daily thoughts in the soul-feeding energy of faith.
My life is really quite good. I spend most of my days living the vision I created years ago. Here’s my confession: when times are good, I don’t always practice the faith things with the same intensity that I did when times were bad. Hmmm?
The sad, life-changing events in my life led to an opening for Spirit. I was so open, so ready; I gobbled up every delicious morsel of spiritual guidance. My 20-year old journals describe a lot of pain and loss, but they mostly exhibit the unbridled joy of discovery resulting from my studies and my DAILY PRACTICE of the rituals, prayers, meditations and reading. I felt incredibly alive and hopeful in the midst of difficult times.
So, reminder to self (and maybe you): Don’t just stack the spiritual books next to the chair—read and contemplate them every day. Don’t just teach and write about daily methods and tools to help others shift their consciousness—use the damn tools!
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Dr. Joe Dispensa says, “The way you transform the world, is to transform yourself and give others the permission to do the same.” I’m recommitting to transforming the world through self-transformation and I invite you to do the same. In fact, I just placed This Life is Joy, Roger Teel, (New York, Penguin Group, 2014) and a yellow highlighter on my desk to begin my contemplation the minute I hit publish on this message.
Faith > Fear,
Gary
